Have you ever had a moment in your day cause you to stop and think about what just happened? I had one of those moments occur under an hour ago.
Almost every day I take the bus on campus, and about every day I take the bus home. The bus is a unique system in itself, and I have begun to realize that I might not be using my bus pass to its economic value of $45. A bus trip to campus and home is $1. For the 16 weeks of school I have to make 45 trips on campus and back home. I realize I have been using my bus pass less than 3 days out of the week... which equates to around $45. So... the reality is that I'm cutting it close to actually saving money by buying a bus pass.
Anyways, back to my initial plan of discussion. Unfortunately the bus stop on my return home is located at the intersection of Abbot and Lake Lansing Road, so I am forced to make an undesired trip the 1/4 mile to my house on Swart St. On this trip I am usually accompanied by individuals who live in Capstone Apartments. The Capstone group usually divides itself since some live north of me and others west of me. The division occurs at this one house. It's more like this old rental house, nothing special, just old. All of the "Capstonees" that live west of me use the method of "the shortest distance between two points is a straight line" and walk through the yard of this house. Now this yard has an obvious trail through it. It's a trail that would resemble something obvious like yellow snow as a result of something peeing in it. The effects are the same when you look at the trail; it's disgusting.
I observed something different today though. For the first time, I watched one guy walk out to the street that the house was on, go out of his way, and proceeded to NOT walk on the gross path through the yard.
Now I wonder, "Why?" I'm surprised at this young man's boldness. I noticed that this was accepted by every body. I mean, the path IS already there so why not just use it? BUT he didn't. He avoided it. He stood out. I bet he felt like he was doing the right thing by respecting the property of the person that lived there. It was a simple decision, do the right thing... even in the small stuff.
THAT is the small stuff, walking through somebody’s yard to save you time without their permission.
It's funny that I bring this up. Don't think that I am trying to be self righteous, because I walk through my neighbor's yard every morning to make it to the bus stop. It's more convicting than anything. BUT my difference is that I would have to dramatically walk out of my way (maybe 3 minutes) to make it to the bus stop. Humm.... but does that justify it? What is the maximum sacrifice that I have to make before I justify my actions? What is the cost?
Wait, didn’t Jesus stress out about dying on the cross? Wasn’t He burdened by the sacrifice He was about to make? But He willingly gave His life, because it was what had to be done.
Lesson application:
Do what is right in the small stuff, because that will reflect in your character in the large things.
Someday, I'll have to make decisions that could breach my integrity and character. How prepared am I to make those decisions? How prepared am I to make those decisions that nobody else will ever know about?
...What about God? Will I let Him make those decisions? Better yet, will I listen to what He is telling me to?
This whole growth thing is difficult. I have a long ways to go...
Lord I thank you for your patience, grace, and that you have promised your Holy Spirit to guide me in these situations. If you need to teach me more in this area, please do so. I have a feeling that character and integrity are kind of important.
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
Sunday, January 08, 2006
And the inconsistent sleep pattern continues
Yay, I've been up since 6:30AM after falling asleep at 2:30AM. I can't sleep. I feel like a million things are going through my head. I'm sure most of you can relate (if not all). I've been faced with some challenges lately that have required action on my part. Yeah, there is no passive way out of them. Unfortunately, I can't get into specifics about some of them.
One thing that has been blowing my mind has been the whole graduation thing. I, Mr. Ryan Shannon, will be graduating in May. I have a nice job lined up, plenty of friendships behind me, a great relationship with God, and I'm still SCARED TO DEATH. Hello the "real world" here comes Ryan. I'm going to be hit with some struggles quick, fast, and in-a-hurry after graduation.
Primarily it will be my detachment from the relationships that have developed over these past years (that have been AMAZING), and that's where a lot of faith will be required. For somebody that tries to be "independent and set apart" I fear loneliness and lack of genuine relationships. Obviously, once I move, I'll have to pursue other people. I can't just sit back hoping great and amazing people will fall into my lap (I tried that in Wisconsin.... yeah those were some lonely months). Specifically, I will need to find a group of men that I can connect with. I need men to support me as a man. Without REAL men in my life, I hit the floor.
Then here comes another issue... am I going to be fed or will I feed others? What I mean by that is this: will I be constructive and positive to others around me or will I be somebody that drains life out of others (hence being "needy")? I'm kinda aiming for the positive approach. Oh Lord give me wisdom in that time of my life, and help me to live confidently with you.
Well, I guess since I can't sleep I'll do some reading. Oh by the way, if you're reading my blogs, thanks. I post these with the intention people will read them, and it means a lot to hear things from people that read stuff in my blog. That's a huge encouragement to me. Peace out.
One thing that has been blowing my mind has been the whole graduation thing. I, Mr. Ryan Shannon, will be graduating in May. I have a nice job lined up, plenty of friendships behind me, a great relationship with God, and I'm still SCARED TO DEATH. Hello the "real world" here comes Ryan. I'm going to be hit with some struggles quick, fast, and in-a-hurry after graduation.
Primarily it will be my detachment from the relationships that have developed over these past years (that have been AMAZING), and that's where a lot of faith will be required. For somebody that tries to be "independent and set apart" I fear loneliness and lack of genuine relationships. Obviously, once I move, I'll have to pursue other people. I can't just sit back hoping great and amazing people will fall into my lap (I tried that in Wisconsin.... yeah those were some lonely months). Specifically, I will need to find a group of men that I can connect with. I need men to support me as a man. Without REAL men in my life, I hit the floor.
Then here comes another issue... am I going to be fed or will I feed others? What I mean by that is this: will I be constructive and positive to others around me or will I be somebody that drains life out of others (hence being "needy")? I'm kinda aiming for the positive approach. Oh Lord give me wisdom in that time of my life, and help me to live confidently with you.
Well, I guess since I can't sleep I'll do some reading. Oh by the way, if you're reading my blogs, thanks. I post these with the intention people will read them, and it means a lot to hear things from people that read stuff in my blog. That's a huge encouragement to me. Peace out.
Friday, January 06, 2006
DENIED
AHHH Blogger! I'm not happy with you! I just tried posting a long blog and it got deleted! I'll get YOU blogger!
Wednesday, January 04, 2006
Welcome me back to the planet Blogger.
So I apologize for not posting in umm.... let me see.... carry the 1.... over 2 months. I really don't have a great reason to tell you why it is that I haven't been posting. One reason was because I hit a point in my semester where I got quite lazy. It was sad, but more on that later. The second was because I have been gone over break a lot, so I really haven't been around much the past few weeks. Lastly, I just forgot about my blog. See... I'm not rebeling against blogger or anything, so now you can sit back, take a sigh of relief, and read along as I give you the ins and outs of what has been happening lately.
Well, the last time I posted I was talking about a lot of the why questions and how I've been so self focused along with what may future had in store for me. I began to dig in my heart for options for once I graduated. Unfortunately, any full time ministry is out of the question because I have too much student loan debt under my belt. BUT I don't won't that to hinder me from ever doing full time ministry, so one of my primary goals over the course of the next couple years is to eliminate that debt. So don't worry Campus Crusade, I may be back. Ohhhhhhh man, won't that be crazy.
One option that was laid on my heart was for me to consider joining the military, and preferably the Army... Ok, you can pick your jaw up from off of the floor now. "Unexpected" is how most people put it. So yeah, I thought about being a soldier. Not an easy thing to do. For one, I love my country (even though our culture needs some serious change). I am blessed with what I have been given. I never deal with persecution, starvation, being unable to pay the bills, and having somebody tell me where to be and where to go and how to do it all the time. I'm free, and I've benefitted from that. Unfortunetly, that freedom wasn't free. This is a way for me to give back by committing to service for a few years.
Secondly, I have had a pretty easy life. I have never faced tragic momments that were unexpected. My life hasn't been challenging enough, and well... dull. What I mean by dull is this: I've faced too many of the good times and the average times, but not too many of the stretching times and difficult times. Partly because I have been given much (and to whom much is required), and partly because I have not done anything. "But Ryan what about the great degree you got in Mechanical Engineering?" well my friends, that was great, but in the long run it will mostly benefit me, but not other people. Really, it's difficult to say if it was worth the time I put into it, when I missed out on investing my time into God and others.
Anyways, about the military thing. I discovered it wasn't the right route to go, because my heart was trying to find satisfaction in being a soldier, like I was being transformed into somebody great. Jesus only satisfies really, and I missed that. I would say that the military would place me into an atmosphere that would help me to grow, but it wouldn't fill my soul. Until I feel that I am aboslutely needed and agree with our purpose, I'll stay as a civilian fighting for Jesus.
So great issues were brought up when this whole military thing was. Why am I feeling unchallenged and bored? How can my relationship with God be refocused? Where is that BATTLE to fight? Ah, that good part of a man's heart that continually seeks a battle to fight. Well lets us see what the Good Book has to say about some of this....
"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." -Ephesians 6:10-12
Ohhhhhhh, so you mean we're struggling against the evil and the sin of this fallen and broken world, and not necessarily people that we don't agree with? Ahhhhh.... got it. Secondly...
"So I find this law at work: when I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God's law, but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members." -Romans 7:21-23
Ah, so a battle wages war within me? Humm.... so how do I respond to that?
"No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us" -Romans 8:37
Context:
All these things = all things that attempt to separate us from the love of Christ, hence evil.
Him = Jesus Christ.
So you're saying I can more than conquer all evil through Jesus Christ? Well then... I guess Jesus is the answer. Big surprise, but how easily we do forget....
So with all this in mind, I've been given a challenge. What are my desires of my heart that are from Christ? What goals will point me in that direction? The reality in all of life is that Christ desires that we will know him on a very deep deep level and that he is the Lord of our life. That would be my first desire (I've already written all of these main desires down and the goals so I'll be brief). So what can I apply to help me to know Christ more? Well, text book answer... read my bible and pray. Not just read my bible, but savor my bible, study my bible, breath my bible, and live my bible. I shouldn't pray for what I want instead I should be praying for what God wants, for more understanding of God, for understanding His will, and for a desire to know him deeply. I have some accountability set up to help challenging me to run after God, because I can't tackle knowing God by myself.
Mainly the other desires are along the lines of staying healthy, building the body of Christ and strengthening it. A woman fits in there somewhere.... :) I'll blog about those later.
Oh by the way, I did decide what I was going to do after graduation. I have taken a job as a production engineer working for Toyota in Erlanger, Kentucky. It's just across the river from Cincinnati, Ohio. Again, I'll blog about that later. Ha, I feel like I just typed up a large report.
PUMP IT UP!
Well, the last time I posted I was talking about a lot of the why questions and how I've been so self focused along with what may future had in store for me. I began to dig in my heart for options for once I graduated. Unfortunately, any full time ministry is out of the question because I have too much student loan debt under my belt. BUT I don't won't that to hinder me from ever doing full time ministry, so one of my primary goals over the course of the next couple years is to eliminate that debt. So don't worry Campus Crusade, I may be back. Ohhhhhhh man, won't that be crazy.
One option that was laid on my heart was for me to consider joining the military, and preferably the Army... Ok, you can pick your jaw up from off of the floor now. "Unexpected" is how most people put it. So yeah, I thought about being a soldier. Not an easy thing to do. For one, I love my country (even though our culture needs some serious change). I am blessed with what I have been given. I never deal with persecution, starvation, being unable to pay the bills, and having somebody tell me where to be and where to go and how to do it all the time. I'm free, and I've benefitted from that. Unfortunetly, that freedom wasn't free. This is a way for me to give back by committing to service for a few years.
Secondly, I have had a pretty easy life. I have never faced tragic momments that were unexpected. My life hasn't been challenging enough, and well... dull. What I mean by dull is this: I've faced too many of the good times and the average times, but not too many of the stretching times and difficult times. Partly because I have been given much (and to whom much is required), and partly because I have not done anything. "But Ryan what about the great degree you got in Mechanical Engineering?" well my friends, that was great, but in the long run it will mostly benefit me, but not other people. Really, it's difficult to say if it was worth the time I put into it, when I missed out on investing my time into God and others.
Anyways, about the military thing. I discovered it wasn't the right route to go, because my heart was trying to find satisfaction in being a soldier, like I was being transformed into somebody great. Jesus only satisfies really, and I missed that. I would say that the military would place me into an atmosphere that would help me to grow, but it wouldn't fill my soul. Until I feel that I am aboslutely needed and agree with our purpose, I'll stay as a civilian fighting for Jesus.
So great issues were brought up when this whole military thing was. Why am I feeling unchallenged and bored? How can my relationship with God be refocused? Where is that BATTLE to fight? Ah, that good part of a man's heart that continually seeks a battle to fight. Well lets us see what the Good Book has to say about some of this....
"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." -Ephesians 6:10-12
Ohhhhhhh, so you mean we're struggling against the evil and the sin of this fallen and broken world, and not necessarily people that we don't agree with? Ahhhhh.... got it. Secondly...
"So I find this law at work: when I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God's law, but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members." -Romans 7:21-23
Ah, so a battle wages war within me? Humm.... so how do I respond to that?
"No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us" -Romans 8:37
Context:
All these things = all things that attempt to separate us from the love of Christ, hence evil.
Him = Jesus Christ.
So you're saying I can more than conquer all evil through Jesus Christ? Well then... I guess Jesus is the answer. Big surprise, but how easily we do forget....
So with all this in mind, I've been given a challenge. What are my desires of my heart that are from Christ? What goals will point me in that direction? The reality in all of life is that Christ desires that we will know him on a very deep deep level and that he is the Lord of our life. That would be my first desire (I've already written all of these main desires down and the goals so I'll be brief). So what can I apply to help me to know Christ more? Well, text book answer... read my bible and pray. Not just read my bible, but savor my bible, study my bible, breath my bible, and live my bible. I shouldn't pray for what I want instead I should be praying for what God wants, for more understanding of God, for understanding His will, and for a desire to know him deeply. I have some accountability set up to help challenging me to run after God, because I can't tackle knowing God by myself.
Mainly the other desires are along the lines of staying healthy, building the body of Christ and strengthening it. A woman fits in there somewhere.... :) I'll blog about those later.
Oh by the way, I did decide what I was going to do after graduation. I have taken a job as a production engineer working for Toyota in Erlanger, Kentucky. It's just across the river from Cincinnati, Ohio. Again, I'll blog about that later. Ha, I feel like I just typed up a large report.
PUMP IT UP!
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